The Stuff Marriage is Made of

Marriage is a sacrament. It’s a vocation. Marriage is romantic and wonderful. It’s also chaotic and frenzied. Today we’re talking about the stuff marriage is made of!

In our recent podcasts, we’ve spoken about using the minutiae that comprises marriage to be an act of love (listen to Finding God in the Bubbles) and even the lessons that we can learn about marriage from TV shows (listen to last week’s What NBC’s This is US Can Teach Us about Marriage).

Marriages—and those in them—need support. They say it takes a village to raise a child (and that’s 100% true!), but we think it takes a village to model what marriage is and to support husbands and wives. Marriage is a big deal. That’s why we launched this blog.

Superman & Me!

What is Marriage?

According to the USCCB, citing the United States Catholic Catechism for Adults, “The Sacrament of Marriage is a covenant, which is more than a contract. Covenant always expresses a relationship between two persons. The marriage covenant refers to the relationship between the husband and wife, a permanent union of persons capable of knowing and loving each other and God.”

Dictionary.com tells us that covenant, in the Biblical sense, means “a. the conditional promises made to humanity by God, as revealed in Scripture. b. the agreement between God and the ancient Israelites, in which God promised to protect them if they kept His law and were faithful to him.” That last definition sure does sound like the vows we exchange with our spouses, sealing our covenant. That’s food for thought.

Marriage isn’t perfect. It isn’t this fantasy from stories and chick flicks, either. Marriage is a covenant between husband and wife. We’re sanctifying each other. My job is to help Superman get to Heaven and his, conversely, is to help me end up there, too.

A candid shot of us enjoying delicious coconut flour wedding cake celebrating the beginning of our “stuff marriage is made of” journey.

The Stuff Marriage is Made of: Moments

Marriage, like life, is made up of a string of moments. And it is beautiful.

It’s listening to “Africa” by Toto at top volume, with a smile on my face because Superman loves it, despite the fact that I do NOT like the song. Although—okay, I’ll admit it—it’s growing on me. A little.

Marriage is knowing when to bite your tongue. I’m a grammar Nazi. I know this about myself and count my blessings that those family and friends around me choose to be around me despite this character flaw.  It’s resisting my annoying habit of correcting mispronunciations for the sake of preserving Superman’s feelings.

It’s also knowing when not to bite your tongue. Sometimes, there have to be hard conversations. Money, for instance, is a hard conversation for most couples (check out Rachel’s posts 8 Tips for Talking Money to Your Spouse and Yikes, It’s Budget Time Again! for some tips on how to do that, if you’re struggling). At times, I need to hear tough love. Other times, I have to give it. Superman isn’t always self-motivated. I’m not always going to notice the pile of dishes and then do them immediately.

Marriage is an ebb and flow, a give and take. It’s a balancing act. It’s a color-coded dry erase calendar in the entryway to help assist in that balance. I once heard it described as follows: “Marriage is what happens between the photographs in a scrapbook.” As a new wife, I do find this to be true.

You know what, though? It’s also having someone with whom I can share my hopes, dreams, and fears. Marriage is having a captive audience for my terrible jokes (sorry, Superman!). It’s crying and laughing and cuddling. A lot of it is taking a leap of faith together and knowing you’ve got one another’s backs.

And, perhaps most importantly, it’s constantly evolving.

Join the Conversation!

I know that this is written from the perspective of me, new kid on the marriage block, so let’s get your take! What are some of your marriage moments? Share them here or on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram using #MarriageMoments. What are the areas of marriage that bring you struggle? Where do you feel like you’re excelling? Any tips for this newbie?

 

Kristi

P.S. If you didn’t get a chance to read Monday’s post on Cool Catholic Women, go check out what five of our favorite Catholic bloggers have to say on marriage. Also, EXCITING NEWS! Hail Marry is now available for following on Bloglovin! Follow the blog with Bloglovin

About The Author

Hail Marry Blog

We’re Kristi & Rachel: best friends married to two awesome guys that we met on Catholic Match.

2 COMMENTS

  1. WEEZY Miller | 8th Mar 17

    One of our marital lessons—and this one is a lesson in progress–is that couples should recognize when their partner has changed for the good. What I mean is, we all have things that need working on or need improvement. It’s important that we encourage each other and not adopt the idea that our partner will never change his or her viewpoint or ways of doing things for the better. My hubby and I have both made the ugly assumption about each other, and it does nothing but tear down rather than builds up. Happily, we’re getting better at recognizing this.

    • Hail Marry Blog | 8th Mar 17

      That’s fantastic advice! Thank you so much for sharing!

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